I borrowed this from an acquaintance--I met him at a work conference. He's a fabulous designer and just a great guy. Thougn I've modified it a bit (he wanted to hold a tarantual; there's no way I would ever voluntarily get within 30 feet of one), it's pretty true to the original--that he borrowed off someone else!

Life's to do list - Completed items are bolded

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain (I've been to almost all the national parks and we've gone hiking/climbing many times)
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Owned horses
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone (I'm a hopeless romantic)
08. Said 'I love you' and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Sat on a beach for a week and just thought
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea (well, at the lake)
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise (with an important someone even!)
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars (again, with someone special)
,b>20. Changed a baby's diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower (it's funny that the someone special has all been the same guy...)
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope (my dad's got one)
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment (many, many times...)
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb (does a llama or wallabe count?)
33. Seen an eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer (techincally I do right now!)
40. Visited all 10 provinces or all 50 states (I'm only missing Alaska & Hawaii)
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Picked a bridge in Paris, sat on a bench there, and just wrote
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them
54. Been to every Civil War battelfield/fort
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your cds
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Posed nude in front of strangers
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class (does going with my mom when my brother took lessons years and years ago count?)
71. Played D&D for 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie (just t.v. commercials and a news spot or two, but there's still time...)
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Ridden in a red millenium Corvette with the top down
81. Published a book (it's written, just not sent to a publisher yet)
82. Been on television news programs as an "expert"
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage (many, many times)
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Been named a Godparent
88. Had a one-night stand
89. Been hit on more than once, in each bar you went to, in one night
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone (does certain people's marriages count?)
92. Buried one of your parents
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
95. Performed in aisles at Rocky Horror
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
98. Created and named your own constellation of stars
99. Created and sold your own jewelry
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge (I went under it on a boat...)
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery (sorta--the insurance company said it was, but it wasn't the traditional kind)
104. Survived an illness that you shouldn't have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication (every day!)
106. Lost over 100 pounds (I'm working on it...)
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Petted a stingray (not after the crocodile hunter's death!)
110. Broken someone's heart (twice, though I didn't know it either time until much, much later)
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone (my toe)
114. Had oral surgery
115. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol (airgun?)
117. Had a panic attack
118. Ridden a horse (ummm... the Equestrian team... compeating... lessons... shows...)
119. Had major surgery
120. Had Chickenpox
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon (nope, stayed on the rim and looked wa-a-a-a-y down...)
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Driven a WaveRunner on the ocean
127. Learned to play more than one instrument
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Ridden a horse on the beach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes (Love 'em!)
134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey
135. Selected one "important" author who you missed in school, and read their books.
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating (just fish at the lake)
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146: Dyed your hair
147: Been a DJ
148: Shaved your head
149: Caused a car accident
150: Saved someone's life

An era is coming to an end and I feel with it, so is my relationship with my dad. We've fought so hard every night that I'm losing my voice and I just keep thinking that on Thursday, I'm forever moving out of his house and these are the memories I'm taking with me. It's ripping my mom in two, which I hate, but I' don't know what to do. I know it's not me, that it's him, but I still can't help thinking it's me, you know?

It scares me so much to do this, too, because I have this irrational fear that he's going to die and my last words to him are going to be these terrible things. With him being so sick for so long and so volitile, it just worries me.